It's seriously another and I really can handle it.
I'm on the edge and about to break. The feelings I had when I almost committed suicide before are lingering in the back of my mind again toying with me and teasing.
Plain and simple, I am a hot mess. I've been abused and broken and no one will pick up my pieces and put me back together again. I'm a real life Humpty Dumpty and no one gets it.
It would be so much easier to just let it all go and be don't with everything instead of having your emotions toyed with and played like a fiddle. I wouldn't have to stare people in the face whom, no matter how hard I try, I can't please. And they wouldn't have to look at me all tattered, torn, and broken. We would all be free.
But then where would that leave my daughters and my step-son. Damaged and heartbroken forever. And they are the reason I hold onto all the shiny tiny glimmers of false hope hoping that someday things will be how they where meant to be.
I am so sorry you are having a rough time. I know I have had rough patches in my life that I thought I could not handle but then I look at my daughter
ReplyDeleteand remember I need to keep fighting and stay strong for her.
When she gives me a hug and tells me she loves me it melts my heart every
time. She is my biggest accomplishment.
New follower on twitter too! Please stop by http://momsinvent.blogspot.com/
and have a few laughs!